Baby Boy and Baby Girl's Mama

After much talking, praying, and heartache, Randy and I have decided to get rid of our dogs.  I cannot believe I just wrote that.

We moved last fall, and were so excited for ourselves, and also for Rosie and Milo.  They didn't have a yard, though, and quickly became "country dogs" by running away (sometimes all day long), hunting animals (and bringing them back as gifts for us!), getting ticks, and killing the neighbor's chickens.  But actually, that's not the reason, because I could make something that they would be trapped in.

The house we moved to is owned by our wonderful family members who had many dogs.  In fact, they had a large kennel.  Although it was not an indoor kennel, no matter how well I cleaned, Milo can smell the other dogs that have lived there, and marks on EVERYTHING.  We have had Milo since he was weaned, and besides basic housetraining, has only twice pottied in our house.  Once was when he was dewormed; poor baby pooped in the floor before he could make it outside.  The other time was when we had a visiting dog in our house, and he marked around the kitchen table.  Since we've moved, every time I clean, I find pee in my floor.  On the pellet stove.  On the floor speaker.  On our couch.  On the kitchen table legs.  On all the bedroom doors.  On RANDY'S GUITAR.  I cannot live like this anymore! 

And the hair.  My Lord, the hair.  It's on our clothes, couches, floors...I just want a clean house!

There is no excuse I can give that makes this better.  I. AM. A. TERRIBLE. PET. OWNER.  I should allowed to raise anyone.

I think I project a lot of my emotional needs onto my dogs.  It feels good to be a mama, even if it's to dogs.  They love me unconditionally.  They are affectionate.  They have enriched my life so much, and I am so thankful for them.

Back when I was selling dogs for my dad, we had a little guy born that was the runt of the litter.  He had a pigmentation on his nose that looked white, and he was so tiny!  Try as I might, I could NOT get a good picture of him.  No one wanted him!  I couldn't believe it, because he was, by far, my favorite puppy.  I named him Milo, thinking it was temporarily his until new owners named him.  While his brothers and sisters found their perfect homes, "baby boy" didn't have one.  Well, when he was fully weaned, we brought him home, just until he found his family, or so I thought.  Within a week, I took him off all our puppy ads. We were in love!

He potty trained relatively easily.  He was perfect for us.  We enjoyed watching him grow from a little runt into a beautiful boy.  :)

After having him a few years, my dad wanted to get rid of some of his grown dogs, and I always loved Rosie.  She is energetic, loves people, and had never gotten her chance at being a house dog.  I wanted her, and while Randy was working on the road, brought her home to live with us.  The transition was a very difficult one.  She has never known how to play because she was never played with, didn't understand treats, and she bonded with me right away but hated Milo.  She was also a "runaway".  She will dig through or jump over any fence.  LOL.  I cried every day for a week, because my other baby was upset with her, and instead of butting his way in, he'd just hang his head and go to the couch, dejected.  I had to find the balance of loving both of them in their own ways.  When Randy came home 2 wks later, the household was running perfectly.  She bonded with him, too, and now fits right in.  And more, they love each other!

Randy laughs at me because I talk to myself, or talk to the dogs, in 3rd person.  I always say, "Give Mama a hug, baby boy."  And to Rosie, I say, "She's the sweet girl.  That's what her Mama thinks." 

I honestly don't know if I can do this.  The home they are going to is technically perfect.  But, oh, this hurts! 

The Babies